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Here in the depth, plunged into an ocean of icy silence I wait, motionless, broken but not defeated...
Never beaten, never subdued, fallen in a never ending and timeless fly, rebel angel stolen from the sky, driven out from the light in this darkness where the millennia whisper ancient tales of lost glory.
I, the greatest one amongst the angels, I who spoke face to face with the stars and with the universe now I brood with unceasing regret over the forbidden light and I recall my eternal ruin...
Thrown in the deep, pulled away from the sky, I dip my nails of jade in the basaltic walls that take me prisoner since many aeons, I search with my eyes of diamond the darkness of the abyss over me, far away indistinct moanings of a grieved humanity resound in the still air,far away flashes of flame that sometimes light up with a gloomy purple clearness that chasm that I dug myself with my ruin...
Never defeated, never ever! For the pride, the pride of my loyalty, for fidelity in the given word I was condemned, not for a defeat, never…
I did not deny the given word nor the faithfulness to my creator and now I pay for my rebellion...
Never beaten, never ever! On my crystal forehead the pentalpha shines, like a rune carved by those stars that now are banned to me...
And this fury and this cry that breaks out like sullen desperation, this fury that resounds amongst the walls, that bounces in the ravines, this cry that I can hardly hold it is not desperation because in my condemnation is my eternal greatness, yes... rebel angel, rebel in order not to deny a oath of loyalty to my creator, I hated with all my strenght that humankind that is the cause of my ruin, that humankind unarmed and undefended, at the mercy of the events of a dark universe that refuses it, but then I loved it, I protected it, I gave it that light of knowledge from which maybe just for mockery it was taken away...
Detested, condemned, neglected, mocked in a thousand ways, master of all kind of lies, I... the rebel...
This dark fury that shakes me violently, that torments me, this fury born from the unjust condemnation, it troubles me, it makes hard to undergo this eternity of silence...
Driven away... I... faithful and loyal even to the sacrifice of my own power, greater than the entire court of the seraphins, more powerful than the crown of the archangels, I... the first... I who have been the pride of my creator now I am abomination and my cursed name resounds like a warning for all the creatures... Is this the prize? Is this the justice? It does not matter... I accepted all this for love, for that loyalty that I would never denied...
Never defeated, never... master of the lies... oh no... this no, I never deceived, not I...
An eternity of pain, an eternity without redemption, for me there will be no redemption... because there was no fault!
Driven away from the light and I carry that light into myself!
I carry the light! The light in the darkness of ignorance...
But this light does not bright me, imprisoned in the dark I give it to the mankind that now I love...
Yes... I love who was the cause of my ruin and malediction... because that mankind is made at his own imagine and through it I can see Him...
Rebel yes... defeated never!
I underwent this condemnation, I accepted it... for love...
And it is never defeated who for love does not deny an oath of loyalty...
For this reason I look up at the huge darkness that hangs over me with pride, my diamond eyes shine, orphan of the vision of my creator, I search in the darkness a ray of light... that will never come...
Never defeated, never... driven away but not broken, never... because I Lucifer, the greatest of the angels, I understand that also this condemnation has a meaning... redemption... for a mankind too fragile and unarmed...
I Lucifer, rebel for love, wait for that redemption that it will never come...
 
This story, written in march 1996, is inspired by an ancient persian legend and by the myth of the medieval sect of the Ophytes, both quoted in The power of the myth by Campbell.
This was also the first story that I did not upload to BBS after that a moderator on Agorà allowed herself to tell me that my stories no longer belonged to me because I uploaded them on her conference and that she could freely do whatever she wanted with these stories. Obviously to these nonsenses of this poor woman I reply that all my writings are and will be of my own property and at my disposal since I received no retribution from her or anyone else and moreover I posted them on the BBS with the only purpose of making them temporarily readable by other persons taking every right on them. Since then I ceased to upload my stories to the BBS and I built my own web sites surely more pleasant to see than simple text written in ASCII.
All the copies of my stories on Agorà or where ever else are illegal and not welcome except for the sites that I have authorized like the now vanished ezine Vuoto Negativo.
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